The first thing you need to understand about cat food flavors is that they're all the same. Oh sure, one variety might have a smidgen more chicken while another has a tad less beef, but for the most part they're just indistinguishable mush. The ever-so-slightly different formulations, the different flavor names, the different label colors assigned to each flavor -- that's all just to give you the comforting illusion that you're providing your cat with some semblance of variety when in fact you're just serving up the same ground-up cow cheeks and minced chicken gizzards again and again.
One of the more amusing cat food flavors of recent vintage was something
called Kitty Stew, a name that I found handy whenever my cat tipped over
the trash bin, knocked over a plant, or otherwise misbehaved. "You'd better
cut that out," I'd say, "or I'll have you ground up into Kitty Stew!"
Apparently I wasn't the only who noticed the product name's potentially
doubled-edged meaning, because, in a classically inconspicuous move, the
name of the flavor has been subtly altered -- it's now Kitty's
Stew. (And in case anyone's wondering, it qualifies as "stew" because
they tossed a few scraps of peas and diced carrot in with the cheeks and
gizzards.)
product's manufacturers have chosen. But while the train of thought is simple
enough, you've still got to wonder why anyone would choose to put the word
"False" front and center on their package. Not only that, but a false alarm
is, y'know, a bad thing, something we're taught not to do, a crime
-- not exactly the most likely thing to name your product after.
