Core77

Internet forums are driving me freaking crazy

By Rain Noe - January 14, 2010

in Object Culture

I'VE JUST ABOUT HAD IT with trying to find answers to questions I have in internet forums. Something about internet forums turns people into didactic idiots who are dying to share what they know--completely independent of your question. Here's an example: Let's say I wanted to buy good tomatoes in Chicago. That's it. Here are the responses I would get: Q: Does anyone know where I can buy good tomatoes in Chicago?

1. Forget about tomatoes, you need to buy zucchinis. Try Chicago's Zucchini Emporium. 2. I know this place in Chicago that used to sell awesome tomatoes, but they closed five years ago. 3. Tomatoes in Chicago suck. Philly has the best tomatoes. 4. RE: "Philly has the best tomatoes" No way dude, New York tomatoes are best. 5. Why would you want to buy tomatoes? Tomatoes are for [insert racial/cultural epithet here]. 6. I know three places in Chicago that sell terrible tomatoes. 7. If you're going to Chicago you should check out this jazz bar at _____. 8. OMG I'm looking for Chicago tomatoes too, please e-mail me if you find a place. 9. I didn't know you could buy tomatillos in Chicago. 10. This might be off-topic, but does anyone know where I can buy chinchillas in Toledo?

I know those answers might not seem accurate to you; that's because I took pains to spell everything correctly.

o

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KGB

15 years ago

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Friggin' hipsters. First it was coffee, then it was microbrews...are fresh veggies the new fad?!
:-)
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Kevin Arthur

15 years ago

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Totally agree! I hate forms where the fields aren't big enough, tab order is broken, and don't get me started on phone numbers!

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dave o

15 years ago

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yea, catfish are awesome

:)
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Steve

15 years ago

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Here here! I agree completely, and have been ranting about this to my friends quite regularly. As a guy with obscure tastes in hobbies I spend too much time on forums hearing useless opinions and suggestions. Thanks for the laugh!
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Emily

15 years ago

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Have you tried AskMetafilter? It's not always on-topic, but especially with objective questions ("Where can I find X?" and so forth), respondents generally do a great job of answering the question that was asked.
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Leszek Cyfer

15 years ago

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I guess it's rather a question for twitter than for a forum :)

What's the answer? Everybody thinks selfishly about himself, no one ever puts himself into your shoes.

Memememememememememememememe....

You?ck
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Joel McKellar

15 years ago

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You forgot a few memes:

11. Typical... Mr. Hippie can't find his veggies and decides to whine about it on the internet... Maybe if you looked somewhere other than your socialist co-ops, perhaps in A REAL FUCKING STORE, you could find what you're looking for. Eat a steak bitch!

12. First the bailout, and now we can't find tomatoes??? IMPEACH OBAMINATION!

13. Can't someone boot Poster 5 already? He's a [insert ad hominem attack here], and he completely ruined our discussion about [link to unrelated topic where Poster 5 was acting like a douche].

14. [cartoon/image of a tomato doing something disgusting/funny/horrifically inappropriate]
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Creative Ideas

15 years ago

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Agree with you hipstomp
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Dylan Bennett

15 years ago

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This is exactly why I have been extremely happy with the Stack Overflow model of helping out programmers. Those kinds of answers immediately fall to the bottom and the actual answers rise to the top. I have yet to find a more useful place to get programming answers on the Internet. I wish more forums were like that.
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Chitrak Srivastava

15 years ago

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hilarious..
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